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You have to admit the way we do debates today stinks. Stupid questions from the audience, moderators who appear to have an agenda and candidates who wouldn't know the truth if it bit them on the backside. That's what made this dream so amazing because it showed me how we can correct all those problems and give the country a debate they deserve.
Taco Bell is why I'm dreaming about the debates
My dream continues. In the event Kiefer's voice and the slime can't stop the lying, we get back to the reason I want the debate held at SeaWorld. The stage they're on will be built over a huge water tank and each candidate will be standing on a trap door. In the water below the stage we will borrow a page from Austin Powers and have a tank full of sharks with laser beams attached to their heads. And please don't tell me you can't get the sharks and I'll have to settle for ill tempered sea bass, America's future is at stake here. If a candidate has been warned by Watson, slimed and then decides to tell a third lie about their opponent, the trap door opens and it's bon appetite for the sharks.
For starters the debate was held at SeaWorld in Skechers Go Walk 4 Kindle
Each candidate would get only one lie before something bad happened. What? Have you ever seen the award shows on Nickelodeon where they "slime" the guests? Perfect. If Barack Obama or Mitt Romney tell a lie, are corrected and still keep lying, a huge bucket of green slime would drop down on their heads. (Don't worry it's totally non toxic and should wash out fine.) To make it even more fun we could have Lindsay Lohan there to hand them each a towel since she has so much experience cleaning up messes.
Florida. I'll explain the relevance of that location in just a moment. The host wasn't Candy Crowley it was Regis Philbin. Why "Reeg"? Think about it. The man holds the Guinness World Record for being the person who has spent the most hours on camera, at last count well over 15,000. He's won every possible award from the broadcasting industry and more importantly he knows how to handle a guest and keep them on the clock. Whether he was sitting on that set with Kathy Lee and Kelly or hosting a game show, Regis could control the clock and wasn't afraid to cut people off and demand an answer to the question.
the fact from fiction. In real time, and with much more accuracy than Candy Crowley, Watson would cut off the microphone the moment one of them lied and correct them. To make this more effective we would reprogram Watson to have the voice of Kiefer Sutherland. It's a deep and menacing voice, plus I know if Jack Bauer told me to stop lying "or else," I'd pay attention.
You can blame it on Taco Bell. Everyone knows you're not supposed to eat late at night, especially spicy food. So when I ate late, fell asleep and had the most amazing dream it had to be the tacos and hot sauce. I didn't win the lottery or get to play center field for the Yankees. No, this was a dream about the presidential debates. I dreamt of a new debate format and a world where the American people finally got the two things they've been craving for in these things the truth and entertainment.
Something tells me if we made my dream a reality Vans Mens Boots
In my dream there were Skechers Sandals Reggae no questions from the moderator, a panel of journalists with hidden agendas or people in the audience pretending to be "undecided." I put that word in quotes because this late in the game if you still have no clue which guy you'll vote for you are either lying or so disengaged you should have your vote taken away for a year. No, in my dream debate all the questions will be asked by a single man Lewis Black. Yes the rude, irreverent and at times brilliant comedian. I want Black because he can't stand either political party. He describes the democrats are the party of "no ideas" and the republicans as the party of "bad ideas." He would have no qualms about asking tough questions and cutting the candidates off the second they try to pivot, squirm or obfuscate.
the American public would finally get the debate they deserve. If not at least we'd get to enjoy Regis again, laugh at Lewis Black, see Lindsay Lohan out of handcuffs and watch two politicians get slimed. Who's in?
My dream continues. There would be no studio audience to hoot and holler. Instead the only person listening to Mr. Obama and Romney speak would be "Watson" that super computer they used on the game show Jeopardy. Watson would listen to every single word the candidates spoke and parse Mbt Men's Narua Sandals Black
Every four years I contact the national debate committee and tell them I'm available to host one of these shindigs but they never seem to call me back. Is it the shark tank you think? Too much? Fine we'll go with the sea bass if that gets it done.
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